Relax, I'm A Ninja Read online

  “Eddie’s here!” my mom called.

  “Coming!” I checked myself in the mirror one more time. I cleaned up pretty well. My hair was a little long, but I liked it. When I got it cut too short it would stick up in the back. Zits were in the past, for the most part. The charcoal gray suit fit well.

  I waved to my mom as I left, even though she expected more. I wasn’t being such a good son these days, and she was starting to notice. Maybe if she told me what was going on I could be nice again.

  When I got out front, I tried not to roll my eyes. Eddie got one of those massive SUV limos—for the Winter Ball. Not prom. Not homecoming. The semi-formal Winter Ball.

  The door opened and Todd flashed his metallic smile. “Get in, man! Then we can get the girls!”

  I laughed. Honestly, as much as we all liked girls, they hadn’t been part of our past. If Eddie hadn’t been lab partners with Amy our freshman year, I’m not sure we’d have ever talked to girls on a regular basis.

  “Sweet ride, huh.” Stu straightened his tie and looked at the corsage he’d gotten for Maddie. I’d forgotten about all that stuff, and a pit formed in my stomach. Was I supposed to get one for Sarah? Oops.

  “Not sure how you’ll top this for prom, Ed,” I said.

  “I was thinking like a hot air balloon or something.”

  We stopped at Amy’s house first, and I almost went to get her before I remembered that was Eddie’s job. He got out, and I couldn’t help but feel jealous. Moving to Eddie’s spot to get a better view, I watched as he climbed the stairs and knocked. Eddie went through the door for a second, and my heart thumped as I waited for them to come out. Would she be wearing some pink dress again? Would she have her hair all fancy?

  Then they came out—and Eddie’s whole freaking body covered her! I caught a glimpse of a hand and some of her hair. Talk about a rip-off. I slumped and folded my arms. Stu and Todd stared at me curiously. I should have hid my disappointment better, but by then it was impossible to mask how I felt about her.

  The car door opened. I clamped my lips together so I wouldn’t smile like a fool. Amy wore black—much better than pink. There was glitter in the fabric, and it twinkled in the low light as she came toward me. She smiled wide, and I wanted to kiss her so badly. Her straight hair draped past her bare shoulder. She’d put on makeup, though not a lot.

  “Hey guys!” She sat next to me. Only an inch separated us, but it felt like the Grand Canyon.

  “You look nice!” Todd said.

  She laughed. “You say it like I don’t always look nice.”

  “No! I didn’t mean …” Todd fumbled over his words.

  “You do wear a lot of pajamas,” I said.

  “Urusai!” She slapped my arm when she told me to shut up, but then said I looked hot. At least we could flirt in Japanese.

  “Hey, you know it’s true.” I couldn’t help but take in every detail of her. She wasn’t showing that much cleavage, but this was the most I’d seen. Too bad Eddie’s stupid diamond necklace ruined it.

  “You always look nice.” Eddie swooned over her. I clenched my fists, wishing I could tell him to stop checking out my girlfriend.

  “Thanks.” She shifted and grazed my arm.

  This was going to be a long night.

  After we picked up Maddie and Eva, the limo slowed in front of Sarah’s house. It was my turn to get out.

  “You must be Tosh,” Sarah’s mom said with a smile just as bleached as her hair.

  “Yup.”

  “Sarah! Your date is here!” she yelled toward the stairs.

  I was surprised at how well Sarah cleaned up. She wore a nice green dress, and her blonde hair didn’t look so greasy. She didn’t smell bad either. Nothing to Amy, but definitely respectable.

  When I opened the car door for her, I told myself not to be upset if she took my seat. But Sarah went all the way to the back, leaving enough room for me by Amy. I sat between them, and Sarah leaned forward to talk to Amy. “That’s such a pretty corsage!”

  “Thanks!” She waved the massive flower bracelet back and forth. She probably hated it. “Looks like your date was too cheap to get one.”

  “Sorry, I totally forgot,” I said.

  “Oh, it’s okay.” Sarah waved it off, but she did look a little sad. I felt like a jerk for not thinking about this date at all, especially since she’d obviously put work into looking (and smelling) nice.

  “You should wear it, Sarah.” Amy took it off her wrist. “You don’t mind, do you, Eddie? I already have this gorgeous necklace and all.” She smiled up at him, that familiar glint in her eye. Maybe I was reading too much into it, but I got the sense that she’d planned this.

  “Not at all. Sarah can wear it.” Eddie would have let Sarah wear the necklace if Amy asked. He probably would have been Sarah’s boyfriend if Amy asked. Maybe that should have been our tactic.

  “You’re so nice!” Sarah said. Amy put her hand on my knee and leaned over to give Sarah the corsage. She glanced up coyly as she pulled back.

  “It even matches my dress.” Sarah’s clever grin implied she was Amy’s accomplice tonight. The other girls, who made small talk with Todd and Stu, took their turns glancing at us. This was when I realized the innate ninja nature of girls. They used subtle, almost undetectable, maneuvers to get what they wanted all the time. No wonder the kunoichi were so powerful. They were born that way.

  At dinner, Sarah switched seats with me because she was left-handed and kept bumping my elbow. I ended up next to Amy, of all people, who hooked her foot around mine.

  Luckily, no one paid attention to what was going on under the table. Stu was entranced by Maddie, who seemed equally happy to have found someone who could carry on an intelligent conversation about books. Eva and Todd went on about their honors English teacher. Sarah made sure to chat with Eddie about D&D. She was a writer, and he got caught up in discussing how he’d turn her book scenes into campaigns. I pretty much had Amy to myself.

  She put her hand on my knee under the table. “Glad you came.”

  “Me too.”

  Lots of schools took their dances off campus, but it was a known fact that Greenburg Academy had a rocking ballroom. People paid to have their weddings there. When dinner was over, the limo took us to the school.

  The ballroom had gotten the professional decorating treatment. No sappy snowflakes and Christmas lights. The massive crystal chandelier flooded the room in a warm light, making the floral inlay on the floor sparkle. Panels of sheer blue and cream fabric draped over the balcony railing. Rose flower arrangements guarded the doors and refreshment tables. The student council had splurged on a pretty hot local band, too.

  I was more nervous to dance than excited. I’d never seen Stu so much as bob his head, even at the solo dances. Todd shuffled. Eddie flailed. The four of us combined had racked up about six slow dances with a girl. I would have been pumped if I could spend the whole night with Amy, who already bounced to the music.

  “Let’s dance, guys!” She laughed as she carved out a spot in the back for us. The cooler people stayed closer to the band. We knew not to go up there.

  The dancing was atrocious, but it kind of worked out. Maddie said she didn’t dance, and Stu was perfectly fine leaning on the wall with her. Todd and Eva acted like dorks, pulling fake tango moves and cutting between couples. Sarah wasn’t bad, probably better than me. Eddie looked hilarious, but he seemed to be having the time of his life.

  And then there was Amy. How did she get pinned as a nerd? She sure didn’t look like one in that form-fitting, strapless dress. She could have walked right up to the popular kids and they would have welcomed her. Her hips swayed to the beat, every move perfect and beautiful. I shook my head. I had to stop staring.

  When I turned to Sarah, she had a quizzical look on her face. “Amy’s pretty cool, huh.”

  “What? Oh yeah, she’s really cool.” The song changed to a slow one, and Sarah came closer. I took her by the waist, maintaining a good
distance.

  “Don’t worry, I totally won’t be offended if you say yes, but do you like her?” Were all girls ninjas? She’d timed that perfectly. These feminine plots made my friends look dense.

  “Um …” I looked at Amy, who danced too close to Eddie for my liking.

  “I won’t tell anyone, promise.”

  I sighed. Maybe the ninja girls would help us if I confessed. “Yeah, I do.”

  “I knew it!” Sarah smiled as wide as her mouth could go. It was kind of weird to have your date be happy you liked another girl, but I wasn’t about to complain.

  “That obvious, huh?”

  Sarah laughed. “Totally, but don’t worry. She’s crazy about you.”

  “She is?” Duh, she’d spent half the day kissing me.

  “Oh, so crazy. She gets all glossy-eyed any time we say your name. It’s hilarious.” She clapped her hands together when the song ended. “Next slow song we’re switching so you guys can dance!”

  “You’re the best.” At least someone in my “normal” life was happy about Amy and me. I’d spent so many days stressed about how pissed off Eddie would be, so engrossed in keeping it secret. Never in a million years did I picture any of our friends being happy about it.

  Just like she said, Sarah hopped over to Eddie when the next slow song started. “Can I steal your date, Amy?”

  “Oh, sure. Do you mind, Ed?” Amy glanced at me with a hopeful smile.

  “That’s fine.” Eddie frowned, possibly catching on. Still, I was dancing with my girlfriend.

  Amy came toward me as Eddie and Sarah started dancing. She put her arms around my neck, and I put both my hands on her waist. I’d held her closer before—I shouldn’t have been nervous—but it was the first time in public, and we might glow.

  Eddie watched us. I forced myself not to feel guilty. I wasn’t doing anything wrong. His sad puppy eyes were completely unmerited.

  “You really do look beautiful,” I said.

  “Thanks.” She bit her lip. “I’m glad I could get one dance with you. This is nice.”

  “It is.” I stared into her dark brown eyes, nearly black in the low light. She inched closer. I almost pulled her in to get it over with.

  Amy looked at my lips several times. Then she closed the gap between us and rested her head on my shoulder. That must have been her compromise between staying away and kissing.

  “This is too hard,” she said. “I can’t take it.”

  “I know, but maybe it won’t last much longer, what with you and your friends being so sneaky.”

  She sighed. “We’ve been pretending for weeks. This is stupid.”

  I hated seeing her upset, and it was stupid. We were trying so hard to keep others happy when we couldn’t. Eddie would be angry no matter what. It was time to give up and let the chips fall in the mud. We had to tell, but first we had to plan the best way to do it.

  “You’re right.” I hugged her tighter. Her eyes filled with surprise. “I like you too much to hide it.”

  “Tosh.” I guess even geniuses like Amy have mental lapses, because she kissed me.

  We lit up immediately, all green and glowing like usual. A few gasps and squeals filled the air, and I cursed. Our cover had been blown big time. How could she do that? We’d been so careful for so long and now everything was ruined. There was no way we could salvage our covers now. This would go viral. Couple Glows at Greenburg Winter Ball.

  I pulled away, and she covered her mouth. Then tears welled up in her eyes. They didn’t wash away my irritation. But we couldn’t talk now—we had to get out of there as fast as possible.

  “I’m so stupid,” she said.

  As the glowing disappeared, I looked around for the nearest exit through the mass of people surely staring at us. But no one was looking except for our friends. People danced like nothing had happened.

  “Why isn’t anyone freaking out?” I asked.

  Amy scanned the room. “They didn’t see it? They had to see it.”

  “I guess not.” Maybe we were the only ones who could see the light. I let out a relieved sigh. My cover was safe, and that was the most important thing.

  “Too bad it doesn’t fix everything.” Amy whirled around to face Eddie and the rest of the gang. They were staring like we were glowing. I squared my shoulders as we walked up to them. The girls smiled; the guys’ mouths hung open. Eddie stood frozen, just glaring at me.

  “I’m sorry it had to come out like this,” I started. “We didn’t want to freak you out, I guess. We’ve been dating for like three weeks.”

  “Three weeks?” Eddie’s voice burst out like an explosion. “You could have told us! You…this…this sucks!”

  Seeing how quickly he broke down really did make me feel terrible. I should have told him that night when he’d asked—before he invited her to the dance and bought her a diamond necklace. It would have been bad, but not this bad. Why didn’t I say something? “Eddie, I’m sorry, man. My dad doesn’t exactly like dojo students dating each other, and—”

  “Forget it, Tosh. I can’t believe I called you my best friend and you lied right to my face! That’s messed up.” I’d never seen Eddie so mad. The girls weren’t smiling so much anymore, and Stu and Todd looked like they didn’t know what to do.

  “Don’t be mad at Tosh,” Amy said. “It’s not his fault I like him.”

  Eddie glared at her. “No, it’s not, but it’s his fault he likes you. Freaking traitor.”

  “Hey.” I took a step forward. “I’m no traitor. If you guys were actually dating I never would have touched her. We hid it because we didn’t want to hurt you.”

  “Whatever, man.” Eddie shoved me, actually shoved me. I couldn’t find my friend in the hard lines of his face. “Go ahead, take her. And find your own ride home.”

  “Fine.” I clenched my jaw, determined not to hit him back. He probably felt like shit inside, even if he tried to act all bad and strong like he was still playing a computer game.

  I pulled Amy out of the ballroom and leaned into the lockers. They dented under my weight. “Ugh, that went just like I pictured.”

  “I didn’t know he would take it that hard.” She leaned on my chest and kissed my cheek. “I’m so sorry I messed everything up.”

  I tensed. Eddie hated me because of what she did. I’d lost my oldest friend for a girl. Was it worth it? “That was really reckless. You can’t…our cover could have been completely blown. And Eddie, we could have eased him into—”

  She pulled back, folding her arms. “I said I was sorry, okay?”

  “I know, but you did it with the Scrabble game, too. You have to be more careful. I’m just saying—”

  “Well, don’t. I know I screwed up. You don’t have to lecture me.” She was acting so sensitive about the truth. I wasn’t allowed to point out her mistakes? As we glared at each other, our glow slowly dissipated to a faint shimmer.

  “I’m…sorry?” I only said it because I had a feeling I was supposed to.

  She rolled her eyes. “Sure you are.”

  I was about to reply when I heard some girl crying. A flash of pink ran out the school’s front door. Apparently we weren’t the only ones making the dance awful for someone.

  Then a glowing guy followed a moment behind. We both jumped.

  “Did you see that?” Amy asked, all business now.

  “Yeah.” How could I not see that? But it didn’t seem like anyone else noticed. Just like they didn’t notice how we still looked radioactive. Not even the glowing guy seemed to see our aura. My stomach dropped. I didn’t want to know who that was, but I had a feeling I did.

  “An Akuma?” she whispered.

  “Maybe. Let’s go.” Even if we weren’t quite happy with each other, I kissed her for good measure. We might need the extra strength.

  20

  The cold bit through my suit, but Amy still pulled off her shoes so the heels wouldn’t clack. Though her feet must have been numb, it didn’t seem to bother her
as we followed the glowing guy and the running girl along the dimly-lit sidewalk. The street was abandoned, just the usual line of cars jammed against the curb.

  I recognized them, but only vaguely. They were seniors. I wanted to say the guy was some kind of athlete at school, but I couldn’t find a name. That glow made me wonder if he might be something like us, but it didn’t seem right. She should have been glowing too.

  “Emma! Wait up!” he called.

  “Leave me alone, Simon!” Simon Terry—wrestler. That would be a good cover for someone that beefy. His glow flickered like it was about to go out.

  “Jack didn’t mean it,” Simon said. She stopped running and turned. I pushed Amy behind a car, and we crouched down. So they weren’t together. He glowed by himself, which might have meant—

  “Do you think he’ll hurt her?” Amy whispered.

  “No clue. But if he tries, we need an excuse to talk to them without blowing our covers.”

  “I can do a yearbook thing,” she offered. Our eyes met, and we both looked away. Now that we were facing a possible Akuma, our fight seemed stupid. But it wasn’t like I could apologize.

  “Sounds good.” I peeked around the car. They were still about ten yards from us.

  “And if it doesn’t work?”

  “We’ll have to stop him.” I wasn’t afraid this time. The finger dents I left in the car bumper boosted my confidence.

  The glow in his skin flickered rapidly and then went out. He reached into his trench coat for who knows what. I jumped up from our hiding place, and Amy was right behind.

  “Hey, Simon!” I called. He turned around, glaring.

  “I’ve been meaning to talk to you!” Amy smiled wide without a drop of fear. “The yearbook wanted a few quotes about your impressive wrestling season. Is this a bad time?”

  He smiled too widely as he sized us up. My blood went cold. That was no friendly smile. It was…hungry. Simon could be an Akuma, and we’d offered ourselves up as prey. We looked nice and vulnerable, and no one would connect us to him. Even if Emma put him at the scene, his cover-self had no motive.